April 17th, 2006

Current Music: signed, sealed, delivered - stevie wonder Subject: Amazing Time: 07:10 pm Current Mood: mellow

1. Chuck Norris' tears are the cure to cancer. Too bad he had never cried! 2. It is said that behind Chuck Norris' beard there is not a chin, but another fist. 3. Chuck Norris always wins connect 4 in three tries. 4. Chuck Norris has counted to infinity twice. 5. Chuck Norris can slam a revolving door. 6. When Chuck Norris jumps in a pool he doesn't get wet, the water gets "Chucked". 7. Chuck Norris has never blinked, not once. 8. Chuck Norris sold his soul to the devil for his round-house kick. After the deal was finalized, he round-house kicked the devil and took his soul back. 9. Dinosaurs went extinct from the Chucknorisaurus! 10. According to the Laws of Physics, it is impossible for Chuck Norris to build more muscle. Upon realizing this, Chuck Norris swiftly roundhouse kicked every law of physics known to man, as well as those known only by Chuck Norris. He now has the ability to will his muscles to any level of strength he desires at any given time. 11. When the boogeyman goes to sleep every night, he checks his closet for Chuck Norris. 12. Chuck Norris can lead a horse to water and make it drink. 13. Chuck Norris doesn't read books. He stares them down until he gets the information he wants. 14. When Chuck Norris does a pushup, he isn't lifting himself up - he's pushing the Earth down. 15. Chuck Norris does not sleep. He waits. 16. There is no theory of evolution. Just a list of creatures Chuck Norris has allowed to live. 17. Outer space exists because it's afraid to be on the same planet with Chuck Norris. 18. Chuck Norris is currently suing NBC, claiming Law and Order are trademarked names for his left and right legs. 19. Chuck Norris does not get frostbite. Chuck Norris bites frost. 20. Chuck Norris is so fast, he can run around the world and punch himself in the back of the head. 21. There is no such thing as global warming. Chuck Norris was cold, so he turned the sun up. 22. Chuck Norris doesn't wear a watch. He decides what time it is. 23. Chuck Norris is the reason why Waldo is hiding. 24. Remember the Soviet Union? They decided to quit after watching a Delta Force marathon on Satellite TV.

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March 20th, 2006

Time: 01:46 pm

What is most important to people? When are they most happy? If you'd ask when I feel best, for me, I'd probably have to honestly say that it's when I am comfortable and when things are convenient. Then Jesus said to His disciples, If anyone desires to be My disciple, let him deny himself [disregard, lose sight of, and forget himself and his own interests] and take up his cross and follow Me [cleave steadfastly to Me, conform wholly to My example in living and, if need be, in dying, also]. For whoever is bent on saving his [temporal] life [his comfort and security here] shall lose it [eternal life]; and whoever loses his life [his comfort and security here] for My sake shall find it [life everlasting]. For what will it profit a man if he gains the whole world and forfeits his life [his blessed life in the kingdom of God]? Or what would a man give as an exchange for his [blessed] life [in the kingdom of God]? For the Son of Man is going to come in the glory (majesty, splendor) of His Father with His angels, and then He will render account and reward every man in accordance with what he has done. This speaks completely against my comfort and convenience; against me. I guess it speaks about what it means to be a disciple of Jesus, simply and truly. And this is what I want? This is what I hope for everybody? This is the Good News (the Gospel)?

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February 21st, 2006

Time: 05:45 pm

aaand i'm in texas. again.

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November 28th, 2005

Time: 10:14 pm Current Mood: nostalgic

i saw joel and aly at bayshore before i started work on saturday. we were watching 40 year old men wearing elf shoes complete with candy striped stockings. i promised i'd post. done and done. also, i'm at the university of ottawa right now for theatre and english. i also have a girlfriend now. i also am moving to back to texas for eight months in a month. i also ate a very expensive sirloin salad today because i punched it in by accident at moxies. it had roma tomatoes, cucumbers, and a mild quebec goat cheese. served in tangy thai dressing. i see matt and emily once in a while but miles = distance = i never see high school chums anymo = bummer. too many essays now. love love love.

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September 11th, 2005

Time: 11:19 pm Current Mood: italian coffeed

i was at camp all summer and now i'm home. "what to do now?" i wondered. this past thursday morning i went online to compass and clicked "accept" to accept my offer from the university of ottawa for theatre. i went to the university and registered for classes and then off i went to my first class. really wierd. i'm still laughing pretty hard at how awkward i feel. life is... life. i hope you're all enjoying it. i miss a lot of yous that i haven't talked to in a while. love love. mmmike

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May 23rd, 2005

Time: 01:24 pm

deep... One thing kids like is to be tricked. For instance, I was going to take my little nephew to Disneyland, but instead I drove him to an old burned-out warehouse. "Oh, no," I said. "Disneyland burned down." He cried and cried, but I think that deep down, he thought it was a pretty good joke. I started to drive over to the real Disneyland, but it was getting pretty late. If I lived back in the wild west days, instead of carrying a six-gun in my holster, I'd carry a soldering iron. That way, if some smart-aleck cowboy said something like "Hey, look. He's carrying a soldering iron!" and started laughing, and everybody else started laughing, I could just say, "That's right, it's a soldering iron. The soldering iron of justice." Then everybody would get real quiet and ashamed, because they had made fun of the soldering iron of justice, and I could probably hit them up for a free drink. thoughts... Sometimes when I feel like killing someone, I do a little trick to calm myself down. I'll go over to the persons house and ring the doorbell. When the person comes to the door, I'm gone, but you know what I've left on the porch? A jack-o-lantern with a knife stuck in the side of it's head with a note that says "You." After that I usually feel a lot better, and no harm done. Contrary to what most people say, the most dangerous animal in the world is not the lion or the tiger or even the elephant. It's a shark riding on an elephant's back, just trampling and eating everything they see. by jack handey...

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April 24th, 2005

Current Music: death cab for cutie - transatlanticism Time: 10:07 pm Current Mood: content

so i have another journal thing that's not myspace (it confused me). it's http://www.xanga.com/theseriousface xanga is actually neato. uh. so i'm working at moxie's at bayshore and pizza hut at st. laurent, and then i live in barrhaven and south keys. so far to travel, yeesh. so yes my friends. hello hello.

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January 19th, 2005

Subject: marzy dotes Time: 05:01 pm Current Mood: you know; blah

i feel very sore and uncomfortable. my hands are cold and my skin is dry. i feel like i've done something horrible and unforgivable. you know; blah. i got a job at a music store. but after friday i'll have no more hours. as for my future, i don't want to sell anything, buy anything, or process anything, as a career. i don't want to sell anything bought or processed, buy anything sold or processed, or process anything sold, bought, or processed, or repair anything sold, bought or processed. you know; as a career. i don't want to do that. my father's in the army. he wants me to join, but i can't work for that corporation. so what i've been doing lately is kickboxing, which is a new sport, but i think it's got a good future. hmmm. i'm with john cusak on this one.

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January 2nd, 2005

Current Music: mewithoutyou - the gentleman Time: 01:35 am Current Mood: tired

dear left ankle, why do you hate me so? have i wronged you in some past life? have i been less kind to you then to my other joints or ligements? do i behave as if i favor my right ankle and its driven your jealousy into sheer madness? why do you crap out on me when i try to stop in hockey? why do you send shots of pain up my body when i land on you awkwardly in basketball? shall i always have to tape you? and so my dearest left ankle, i hope we can soon become good friends again. until then, i hate you for being so weak. with a tender love, michael.

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December 20th, 2004

Current Music: death cab for cutie - lightness Subject: Style Dee Lux Time: 09:50 pm Current Mood: tired

hey, i'm in ottawa now. prepare for the story. in theory: my flight was to leave portland PDX at 9:30am. it was supposed to bring me to vancouver by 11:30am. i was supposed to be home in ottawa by 9:30pm. in truth: i arrived at PDX at 7:45am. i was hungry at 9:15am. i missed my flight at 9:25am. i waited till the next flight and left at 1:00am. next came a layover till 11:25pm. but wait. this is where the story take a fantastical turn. you think mike is stranded alone in vancouver airport alone with not but a de-tuned acoustic guitar so the strings don't snap in the air. enter; stage right; cousin jeff. i hang out with him, his girlfriend rachelle, cousin jason and his girlfriend shelly (i of course being the tempting fifth wheel). we tour downtown vancouver, see what downtown sights we can. all is well. mike boards plane at 11:25pm. hmmm, who's that in front of him in line? oh, it's his good friend steven brown, one whom he has not seen since high school. there is much rejoicing and we enjoy the flight home and arrive in ottawa at 7:00am this morning. (and what a coincidence too... steve brown slept through his first flight out of BC as well.) mike's five minute food break added 10 hours to his flight time. but he got to see his cousins and meet their wonderful ladies. he's since decided to move to vancouver. he got to hang out with a good friend on the flight home. he's since decided to never ever rent 'elf'. fin. someone call me.

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November 25th, 2004

Current Music: jason upton - come up here Time: 02:01 pm Current Mood: very very good

i'm in san diego now for american thanksgiving. i'm eating crackers and spinach dip. i'm hanging out with a good friend. i finished reading 'the raggamuffin gospel'. i'm reading 'economics in one lesson'. i slept on the floor and woke up with a cold nose. my shirt is too tight. i wept when i saw that matt had won on takeover. i'm trying to grow a soul patch but it may end up looking like i belong clubbing. my hair is fairly short. i have internet access for a week after months of next to none. i miss my ottawa friends. i miss my texas friends. i have great california friends. happy american thanksgiving all!

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October 20th, 2004

Subject: it all happened so fast officer Time: 02:26 pm Current Mood: awake

so i made it to california. this is good. here is a mass e-mail i sent out the the family. i submit it to you for your viewing pleasure: family, mike? texas? ottawa? hanford, california? music? yes, yes. but let's back the truck up for a minute. i, mike, have graduated from an amazing one year internship in texas. i returned to my home in ottawa for a short stint (working in the field of construction), then off to hanford, california to pursue music. neat. i'm sorry to those i didn't have the chance to see! i'll be back in the homeland in december! now, the story entitled: My Road to California part one: it all began in a partly cloudy city called ottawa. michael, our hero, was enslaved to work for the evil labor company, LaborTek, digging pointless holes for hours at a time for money and scraps of food. after a month of torture in the bowells of the LaborTek dungeon, michael escaped to a near by airport, and with the money he had saved departed for california (with layovers in toronto, vancouver, portland, and san fransisco). part two: on arriving in vancouver, one obstacle laid in his path: a sinister dragon named, "U.S. CUSTOMS". *character break* --- okay, i got to customs and the man wouldn't believe me that i worked in canada and all this stuff. trouble. i had to go to a special room with a green door and a sign saying "secondary screening". i was told that when my name was called i was to go through the green door. it was called and i went. there the officer asked me some questions, and told me that i looked and sounded like a typical example of someone that goes to the U.S. and never comes back. he asks me, "okay, convince me you're going to come back." .... .... .... (long, awkward pause) "er, um..." i sputterded. "i, uh, promise? ... i'm not lying, honest." (eyes are rolled by the officer) "um, okay," i began. "when i was in texas my visa was expiring so i drove all the way down to mexico so i could renew it. i was told before leaving by fellow canadians that their visas had expired or even that they didn't have one, and that it wasn't a problem because when you return to canada no one checks it. but i went to mexico anyway because i'm really trying to live honorably... er,... yes. yes, that is all..." i smile. he laughs sarcastically. he leaves. he comes back. "all right, i'm going to let you through," he says. i exhale finally. "because of your religious work and i don't think you're lying. but you have to come to canada.,not mexico, but canada in december." i thank him and gather my papers. "oh, is this mine?" i ask, reaching for a paper on the table. "no, it's the letter of rejection i was about to give you." i swiftly leave the room thanking jesus. (oh, and i got the very exclusive "SSSS" written on my airline ticket. i was the lucky recipient of an extremely thorough search. i, along with my fellow visible minorities [the group was exclusively visible minorities, hilarious], were put in a special sceening line where they searched everything we owned. the lady guard, the one that operated the metal dector, right before the man the did the full body pat-down told me "the S is for SPECIAL". so i'm specialspecialspecialspecial.) *back in character* part three: after defeating the dragon, and going through several layovers, michael is rejoined with his friends chris casarez and jessica miller in sunny sunny hanford, california. where they lived happily ever after, making music until michaels visa expires in december...dang. THE END a wierd update. but thanks if you're read this far. God is so faithful, it's amazing i got through. woopwoop. i lost my phone book, so if you want me to give you a ringy ring, reply with yer phone number! my number is 559-582-5118! hope to talk to you soon. oh, and i wont have email for a while, but please still email me, it helps my insecurities. done. mike c

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September 14th, 2004

Current Music: dashboard confessional - ender will save us all Subject: LaborTEK Time: 06:28 pm Current Mood: okay

its been a month since i've been back in ottawa and things have been... good bad boring boring hard hard working at labortek painful sore nostalgic stretching discovering a lot about me different complacent-y good i bought a ticket for oregon and permitting the border gaurd will let me pass i'll be in california by months end with chris and jessie. pray. be thankful always. but now i work. long hours. early mornings. construction? noone saw that coming. i hope a teacher from my past sees me on the bus after work, with my hard hat, steel toed boots, and extremely dirty garb/face so they can say to themselves in all smugness, "i knew he'd end up there." i miss music and friends. i miss jesus. mike c

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August 20th, 2004

Current Music: underoath - reinventing your exit Subject: MultiSync Time: 10:50 pm Current Mood: blah

i got back into ottawa on the 15th at around 2:30pm. everything was the same as when i left. actually, there was a new gas station off prince of wales. things are so different though. my room hasn't changed at all, but everything about it seems different. i look the same as when i left one year ago, but it feels like i'm seeing everything with fresh eyes. i am kind of bored though. a lot of my friends are at the camp in toronto that i worked at last summer. i read a lot. watched jurassic park with my mom. used the new BBQ thrice. made peanut butter chocolate chip cookies till 4am this morning. and now what?

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August 4th, 2004

Time: 08:47 am

10 days...

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July 24th, 2004

Current Music: Underoath - Some Will Seek Forgiveness, Others Escape Subject: three weeks left Time: 02:52 pm Current Mood: Ready

i am almost done in texas. things happen quick don't they? quicker then i'd hoped, but slower then i thought. my life has been wrecked since i've been here. i can never be normal anymore. i know too much. i've been given too much. i love too much. i hurt too much. i can't just go back to the normal routine. it's no longer an option. i can't be selfish with this life. i'm going to give it away for the sake of others. i'm wierd now. okay, wierder. i dream about sharing my faith. i dream about going to other countries and telling them what has happened in my life, and what can happen in their lives too. i have dreams of seeing people as wrecked as i am. maybe 'wreck' isn't the right word. i'm in a wonderful mess. it's really simple: i am loved. exactly how i am, i am loved. what did i do to deserve it? nothing. what can i do to preserve it? nothing. i'm going to love others because i was first loved. simple. ******************************* Hey unfaithful I will teach you to be stronger, to be stronger. Hey ungraceful I will teach you to forgive one another. Hey unfaithful I will teach you to be stronger, to be stronger. Hey unloving I will love you I will love you I will love you. ******************************* michael

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July 7th, 2004

Subject: trusting my confusion Time: 06:27 pm Current Mood: happy

ugh. who thought life after high school would be akward. it's like i'm graduating high school again. what am i doing next year? what are you doing next year? next year. next year. um. school? music? this is great. deja vu. loving it - mike

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June 27th, 2004

Subject: border run Time: 10:47 pm Current Mood: tired

so i had a six month VISA in the states, and it was expiring today, so on friday myslef and two friends made a drive to the mexican border. we stopped in houston friday night to sleep at my graduated roomates house. we went into mexico for lunch, then came back, then went back one more time (to receive something from the border guard to prove i was actually coming from mexico), got the VISA renewed then headed back to houston for the night again. we were a set up for a joke. i'm from canada, luis is from venezula, todd is from the states. "So a canadian, venezulan, and an american go up to the mexican border and say to the border guard..." it was fun. if anything works out for next year, we might be moving to portland or seattle. but i won't count an unhatched chicken because it's so insanely hard for canadians to stay here legally.

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June 3rd, 2004

Subject: parent communications Time: 09:17 pm Current Mood: tired

so i'm moving jobs as of next week. when all the kids are going to botswana and china and australia, the angry/frightened parents call me and my team and vent. it's called parent comm. and i think it's going to be great. the last time i talked to an angry parent she was most definitely under the influence and i got to use my adult voice to calm her down. and this will now be my everyday job. sweetness. so i'm looking into doing college in dallas as a way of legally staying in the states. it'll be junior college which is a super cheap way of getting all your general ed. credits out, and then going to the expensive university to finish your degree. big question: what should i do? what am i good at? i have no clue. it's 2 to 2 in tampa, i'm interested, and i'm the only human in this state that likes hockey. out.

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May 21st, 2004

Current Music: anadivine - alcohol and oxygen Subject: a story Time: 04:35 pm Current Mood: indifferent

so when i was very little i went down that huge slide at the wave pool with my dad. i couldn't swim for anything and so when we hit the bottom and i got away from him, i was dead in the water. as i can remember it i wasn't even that worried. i knew he was right there and at any second was going to grab me and pull me out. i completely trusted him, i didn't even have to worry about it, i knew i couldn't do a thing anyway so all i could was depend in him. struggling and trying uselessly to do it on my own would just make it harder for him to help me. and so he grabbed me, and i clinged to him and that was that. i'm learning about trust. it's interesting. mike c

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